A letter

Dear Right Hip,

I know we have been through a lot in the past 7 years, so much in fact I tried to save you from a horrible death, yet you seem still bent on my making my life more difficult. I am tempted to saw you off and make you really miserable, alas that won't help me much. I would like to know what you need to help me feel better to help you feel better (still with me? Imagine show me the money... a la Jerry McGuire). I don't want to hate you, but you require me to carry such a burden that I fear and loathe you. I am disgusted by you, yet I can't live without you. You are going to make me put something off for almost a year...something that I have been waiting for, for a very long time. How dare you? Why now? Huh? Part of me blames myself 100% and the other part of me really wonders why you couldn't have just be normal. Would it have been so difficult to act like a normal hip in someone else's body? Seriously.
My heart hurts b/c of your betrayal. I have only one option, and I am not a fan of that option. You suck hip. I mean reallly suck.

Disgustingly yours,
Misthinkle.